Wednesday, 19 June 2013

Advice on Pregnancy

This isn’t a regular entry and won’t have any sex in it so if you’re looking to cum you’ll need to read a different entry. This is aimed at my regular readers – I want to ask your opinion on our future plans (and I’m aware of the stupidity of asking the Internet for advice, but I’m going to do it anyway…). I also promise I will be better at responding to comments than I have been of late…

As you may know, Mike, Jen and I have decided to have a baby. This isn’t something that we’ve decided upon lightly and we are aware that our lives will change a great deal due to the decision. The plan is that sometime after we return from (what will probably be) our last group holiday, Jen is going to let Mike sleep with her – for a couple of weeks, she will remain on the pill so they can do things together and learn each other (in a new way). This doesn’t mean that Jen is no longer a lesbian – she doesn’t want to sleep with Mike as a man but as someone she loves and cares about and has no intentions of sleeping with any other men.

Once Jen is used to fucking Mike (and assuming that she enjoys it, although she believes that she will), the plan is that both she and I will come off the pill at the same time and we will go about our usual sex life with a couple of alterations. The aim will be that Mike will fuck us both each day, one in the morning and one in the evening. Whoever gets fucked will have to allow Mike’s cum to leak out into the other person’s cunt so we share equally. I obviously won’t be sleeping with any other guys (even with condoms on) and neither of us will be doing things with any girls who might have a guy’s cum in them (so to be on the safe side, nobody who’s had sex with a guy in under a week). You may have noticed that we have a few friends who have said they would like to be involved in our conception efforts – the plan being that if they visit (or we visit them), Mike will fuck them and they will deposit the cum into Jen and I in the same way we intend to share it.

Sue (if she is still single) & Lis are certainly going to participate (and Mike is still hoping that Lucy will change her mind and let him fuck her – but as much as I’d like to see this, I somehow doubt it will happen). Sara and Emily may also join in, but this will depend on Emily (and Sara to a lesser extent) avoiding guys for that period. We would love to let some of the people from Jen’s Uni participate as well, but there is very little chance that most of the girls who would be interested would abstain from guys for long enough (although surprisingly Julia has said that she might be willing to just so she can be a part of things). Vicky had also agreed to join in, but she has recently started dating someone – she seems happy so as much as I’d like her to be single and a part of things, I hope she doesn’t break up with him.

The idea of all of this is that Jen and I should have an equal chance of getting pregnant – we will test regularly (using the early pregnancy tests) and as soon as one of us is pregnant Mike will stop having unprotected sex with the other person. We know that there is a chance that we could both get pregnant at the same time – and while this would make things somewhat difficult financially, it would at least mean that we would get a ready-made family in one go (although having to put up with two pregnant women would probably make Mike’s life hell).

Assuming that one (or both) of us can get pregnant, we know that this will vastly affect our sex life. Not many of our really close friends have had babies yet (the ones who will share all of the explicit details), but from what we’ve been told, sex isn’t something that is really on your mind. Admittedly, we have higher sex drives than our friends that now have babies (at least we assume we do) and we’ve read that sex drive can increase in the middle of a pregnancy (in some cases) so we have agreed that whoever is pregnant will get to choose exactly how and how often she gets to have sex or be made to cum and if she chooses not to, then that is also fine). We’ve also agreed that whoever isn’t pregnant will be able to still go and see our other friends to ‘play’. The idea being that if I’m pregnant, Mike and Jen will take turns visiting people while the other one stays home with me (of course, if I feel well enough to travel, I’d be more than happy to go and watch as they play). We have decided though that if I’m pregnant, I wouldn’t do things with other guys (even if I still have a sex drive) and we might extend that to say that we wouldn’t do things with girls either (but we haven’t made up our minds yet).

In the event that both Jen and I get pregnant, we’ve agreed that it wouldn’t be fair to expect Mike to go with no sex so have agreed that he would be able to travel occasionally to visit people (or have them visit us). I expect that as long as Sue is single, she will be happy to let him fuck her and Lis doesn’t seem to want to halt her ‘experimenting’ with him just yet, so we think he will be more than catered for (not even counting Julia, Abrahii & Susan).

Whoever has the baby, we’ve decided that Jen will stay at home and care for him/her so I can return to work (after an appropriate rest). Both she and I are going to be the mother, irrespective of who the natural mother is. We know that this is a pretty unusual situation, but there are families around with two mothers or fathers so it’s not as if we’re doing something completely alien. We’re also hoping that with three of us, we can adapt a method used by one set of our friends and take turns spending two nights looking after the babies at night. For them this meant that they good two (relatively) uninterrupted nights sleep every four nights, for us it will be four nights out of every six so hopefully won’t be too bad.

So we’re looking for any comments or advice on the points we’ve written about (although as usual I’m the one who has to do all the actual writing). If you disagree with what we’re planning on doing, please don’t just say ‘that’s stupid’ but give us a reason and an alternative (not that we’re likely to dramatically change our minds, but we do intend to listen and take on board any good ideas or alternatives).

The next entry will return to the regular takes of cumming…


  1. Sounds like an amazingly hot set of plans. I was always jealous of a friend of mine who's wife never lacked in arousal during her pregnancy to the point where they were still having sex right up until moments before the delivery happened (apparently it helps dilate things).

    Plus post pregnancy there is the possibility of incorporating breast milk/lactating into your range of sexual activities. So interesting stuff there.

  2. We're not counting on increased sex drive during pregnancy - we know this can happen, but:
    a) it's not really needed - I think we keep each other satisfied anyway
    b) it seems much rarer than the opposite - a reduced sex drive

  3. One aspect I find interesting is that if Jen ends up pregnant that means Mike can continue having sex with Andi, but if Andi ends up pregnant Jen is not willing to have sex with Mike anymore. It makes me question if the whole Jen/Mike thing is because she does care about him and the whole baby thing or is this strictly about conception and nothing more. The way I see it is if there is a deep caring involved then it wouldn't be a problem to continue sex during the pregnancy and only stop once the baby arrives. Being that if Andi is pregnant it still allows for a level of participation so Jen doesn't feel 'left out'.

    That is another HUGE aspect to consider. Trust me I've had a pregnant wife with an ex wife also. There is this HUGE sense of feeling 'left out' and though honestly it's not meant at all it just kind of develops.

    Finally I would be leery about having others involved in the conception due to the very nature of the goal. You're now mixing DNA and relying on their word that they didn't have any sex with a guy etc. It would be awkward if the baby is born and it turns out with flamboyant red hair and neither of you 3 have that gene. The way I see it is, fun and games are fine when taking precautions but this is purposefully NOT taking precautions and still engaging in high risk behaviors over an extended period of time. While it will be easy for them to remember the first few weeks if fertility problems develop and it takes a few months those precautions my slip their mind due to sheer forgetfulness 4 months into it.

    Also I am not sure on the way the law works over there but in the states polygamy is illegal. What this means is that if a husband/wife end up pregnant the father/mother pair is by default the primary guardians. That could get awkward if Jen ends up pregnant as she will have to explicitly sign custody papers (And the state mandates they mother pursues child support) whereas with a husband/wife it is assumed. How awkward would that be if she was forced to pursue child support against Mike?

    Another item to consider is that when the child is older, it would be very wise that the 'method' of conception N-E-V-E-R be told to the child. Speaking for myself, I would be uber creeped out if I found out that I was conceived by my mom having sex with over 8 people. Kind of gives it a day-time reality show feel and would affect how I view my mother and would ignite all sorts of questions about my intrinsic value etc. Stuff that would really screw with a teenagers head.

    Also have you considered how awkward it would be if Jen ends up pregnant, the libido drops off the cliff and she doesn't want to do anything, meanwhile you and Mike are horny as hell all the time and she is constantly going through hormone hell? That...would be...a nightmare and a recipe for nightly fights.

    Another point is usually libido doesn't exactly...rebound...after pregnancy in most cases. Usually it takes a while, a LOT longer than you would expect. While one (or two) of you focus on the baby the 3rd may be still in 'party mode'. They go out and still have sex a lot more, while the other stays with the baby and the third has a really low libido due to the birth. There is another recipe for disaster.

    Lastly, have you considered what you would do if you ended up with TWO sets of twins?

    And finally, know that I am just playing devil's advocate here so please know I'm not intentionally trying to offend. I can keep going with the 'what if' as I've done the whole swinger / kid thing but I have class to teach so I have to jet.

    Longtime reader, forever anon

  4. Jen has been teasing Mike for a long time and is used to grinding against him (so they both cum) and more than used to the feeling of dildos in her. She isn't sleeping with Mike as 'a guy', but as someone she loves - she doesn't see this as at odds with her being (very mostly) gay. It may of course turn out that she really doesn't enjoy the feeling of him actually inside her (in which case the sex might just be to make a baby) but she doesn't think this will be the case.

    We're aware of the risk of someone feeling left out and the best we can come up with is agreeing that whoever isn't pregnant, gets to have the next baby (after a while).

    There are some people we can trust to not do things with other people (or to be honest with us if they have). Lis and Lucy certainly aren't likely to fuck other guys and Sue really wants to be involved so as long as we promise to keep her satisfied, she has agreed to stay (otherwise) celibate. Sara and Emily may be more of a risk (at least Emily may be) so we'll have to think about them, but if we're sure it's safe, we would like to include them.

    We honestly believe that we love each other as much as any 'standard couple' do. There is always the risk that things could go wrong and we break up, but that's no different than any other family unit where custody has to be fought in the courts. We're not worried about the legal status of the children (as if I would legally be a mother of Jen's child, or she of mine) but intend to raise them as 'our' children, no matter who they came from.

    ..and don't worry, we have no intention of letting them know how they were conceived (or about our sex life). We also intend to make sure that they know they are loved - we have decided to have a baby (or babies) as a fully informed and much wanted choice.

    As for the sex drive, we also expect that libido will fall - or maybe disappear - for whoever is pregnant. For now we've agreed that we will do whatever we can to cater for this (leaving them alone, having sex elsewhere/outside or just lying with them cuddling if they want companionship). Likewise after birth - we're aware that things are going to change in a huge way and our lives won't be at all the same.

    Mmm - two sets of twins - best course of action would be to panic, but the odds are probably not too far off someone having quadruplets (I'll have to calculate the odds later).

    The comments are all appreciated and help ensure that we really have considered these things and now just said 'yeah, it'll all be fine...'. We do know that planning is one thing and what actually happens is something else, but that's the whole fun of life :)